Stone: The last question

John Henry told his captain “A man ain’t nothing but a man But before I let your steam drill beat me down I’d die with a hammer in my hand, Lord, Lord I’d die with a hammer in my hand” ... But John Henry made 15 feet The steam drill only made nine, Lord, Lord The steam drill only made nine ...

Stone: Funny how? What’s funny about it?

For my book: all you’ll find is laughter: That’s all the glory my heart is after ... For laughter makes men human, and courageous.

Stone: Achy, breaky heart

Let me play the fool. With mirth and laughter, let old wrinkles come. And let my liver heat with wine, than my heart cool with mortifying groans.William Shakespeare, The Merchant of Venice (Act 1, Scene 1). When I arrived at my cardiologist’s office, my usual doctor wasn’t there.So, I saw a Dr.

Stone: If you’ve got the money, honey, I’ve got the time

737 comin’ out of the sky. Won’t you take me down to Memphis on a midnight ride? I wanna move.“Travelin’ Band,” written by John Fogerty“What time is it?” she asked.

Smith: The curse of cul-de-sacs

... next to last house on a dead-end street.Everything about it spelled death and defeat.Sometimes you call an ambulance, or maybe it’s worse.There’s the undertaker at the wheel of his hearse.

Stone: Cataclysms, calamities, and catastrophes

Luck is a very thin wire between survival and disaster, and not many people can keep their balance on it. - Hunter S. ThompsonI have always regarded writing columns about writing columns as a bad idea.Readers don’t want to hear about that sort of thing.

Stone: Is shopping still a pleasure?

There is only one thing for it, then — to learn. Learn why the world wags and what wags it. That is the only thing which the mind can never exhaust, never alienate, never be tortured by, never fear or distrust, and never dream of regretting. Learning is the only thing for you.

Stone: BOGO-free

Anyone who believes the competitive spirit in America is dead has never been in the supermarket when a cashier opens another check-out line. - Ann LandersThe rumors are not valid. I don’t work at Publix full-time; I only visit the Lake Oconee News office once a week to write a column.

Stone: Plagued by the paprika presidency?

I was looking for a used lamp at the Goodwill on Lake Oconee Parkway when I overheard a man say he writes columns for a Greensboro newspaper.I’m assuming it’s that other paper.I hope he’s eating his vegetables because column writing is taxing.

Stone: Colpo di fulmine

I’ve had the blues, The reds, and the pinks. One thing is for sure: Love stinks! - J. Geils Band, written by Seth Justman and Peter WolfI ripped off some of that J. Geils Band song from the ’80s and wrote my version.