737 comin’ out of the sky. Won’t you take me down to Memphis on a midnight ride? I wanna move.
“Travelin’ Band,” written by John Fogerty
“What time is it?” she asked.
“7:47,” I replied, and thought of Kurt Russell trying to land a Boeing 747 at Frederick Field in Maryland (actually filmed at Van Nuys Airport in California) after missing his approach to Dulles Airport in Virginia in the 1996 film “Executive Decision.”
Of course, thinking of Kurt Russell got me thinking about the time I got lost in Macon on U.S. 80 when I was 17.
Freemont Street in Tombstone, Arizona, is where the Gunfight at the O.K. Corral took place, and that street was once part of U.S. 80, which Wyatt Earp (Kurt Russell) and Doc Holiday (Val Kilmer, God rest his soul) walked up prior to the gunfight.
Unfortunately, that’s how my mind works.
How about you? If someone tells you what time it is, do you sometimes fall down a rabbit hole and start flirting with Alice?
For example, if someone tells you it’s 1:01, do you think of a beginner’s class like English 101?
How about 1:40? Would you be reminded of your friend who bought 40-ounce bottles of Olde English 800 at the Quick Stop?
How about 1:51? Does that make you think of Ron Rico 151? Kurt Russell also played Captain Ron Rico.
At 2:25, I always think about the Chrysler slant-six engine popular from 1959 to 2000.
Say it’s 2:40. Well, if 40 ounces were good, 80 ounces would be even better, right?
It’s definitely past your bedtime if it’s 3:02, and you’re thinking about a small block Ford engine.
At 3:10, you’ll need to catch the train to Yuma with Glen Ford and Van Heflin. BTW: If you go to Cuba and someone calls you Yuma, don’t get mad. It’s just street slang for American.
3:40 – If your friend is on his third “fawty,” take his keys. That’s a gallon of malt liquor he has consumed.
3:51 – One was built in Cleveland and the other in Windsor, Ontario (Ford engines, I mean). The 351 Cleveland has eight valve cover bolts. The Windsor has six.
3:57 – You don’t want to find yourself looking down the barrel of one.
4:09 – “Well, I saved my pennies and I saved my dimes (giddy up, giddy up 409).” * The 1963 Impala SS is a sweet whip.
4:10 – My daddy had a misaligned seat, but he wouldn’t take it back to the store because it was a Christmas gift from my mom.
4:26 – Hemi. 4:27 – Semi-hemi. Isn’t it painfully obvious that I love planes, trains, and automobiles?
4:40 – Your friend is now having the DTs.
4:41 – 939-mile highway from Miami to Rocky Top, Tennessee: no smoggy smoke; no telephone bills.
4:42 – Iconic Oldsmobile: four-barrel, fourspeed, dual exhaust.
4:54 – Big-block Chevy engine found in some Chevelles.
5:40 – The police officer says your friend is showing nystagmus in his eyeballs.
6:40 – Just get a keg, why don’t you?
7:07 – I loved this exchange from “Airport.”
Cockpit qualified young man: “The instruction book said that was impossible.”
Joe Patroni: “That’s one nice thing about the 707. It can do everything BUT read.” ** 7:14 – Rhymes with “Hey Jude.”
7:17 – Boeing airplane that was supposed to be the McDonnell Douglas MD-95 but wound up becoming the 717 after Boeing absorbed McDonnell Douglas. 7:27 – Boeing’s only trijet.
7:37 – Two of them came out of the sky and crashed in 1994.
8:12 – Well, they were Krispy Kreme, you know?
8:40 – There is no such thing as non-alcoholic malt liquor.
9:11 – Remember. 9:19 – My father’s birthday, the guy who wouldn’t take the 4:10 shotgun back because my mother bought it for him.
9:30 – Is the year the first Althing was held in Iceland. Seven-year-old Suzaku becomes emperor of Japan the same year.
10:40 – It appears you failed to file your taxes on time again.
And for crying out loud, “12 O’clock High” does not mean buying yet another 40-ounce bottle of Olde English 800.
Well, that’s enough of that. It couldn’t be helped. Sometimes, I like to have a good time. This was one of those ... wait for it ... times.
Selah.
** The Beach Boys, “409” ** Quote from the film “Airport,” written by Arthur Hailey and George Seaton